43

Happy Samhain!!! Blessed Be.


Okay, this year is absolutely flying by. 43 days until the big 30 and I just can't do it. It's all craziness.

What am I going to do with myself?

I guess I'm headed in the right pdirection and it appears I'm taking some of my family with me as well.

I like that part. Hopefully I will continue to make progress.

Lotsa luv

K

42

Oh body, why do you hate me so much?


Honesty people, I challenge you to be inside my body for a day and see what I put up with. I would love to know what it feel slike to NOT feel like crap.

My family seems to think it's because I haven't been drinking my smoothies, and that could be part of it.

I certainly have been lacking in the BEST nutrition lately. Still no Mt. Dew so I haven't completely fallen off the wagon. Just not as good as I should be.


42 days left until the big day. I just can't believe how fast this has gone. I'm pretty sure I'm going to keep doing this blog until I get to where I need to be.

Who knows, maybe having an online diary that people can read isn't such a bad idea.


Keeps me honest.


Kristi

43

Uh ohhhh I'm feeling cranky again. Also lonely. It only lasts a minute but seriously I feel like I need even more change.


Blah!!!!

44

I've still got a ways to go, but I dressed up today and didn't look 100% awful.

I'll post a picture later.

Lots of love

45

I think the scale is lying to me. I haven't been doing anything to lose weight and yet it's saying I am.

It's interesting.

Supposed to go to my best friends little brothers wedding tomorrow. Ashley made me spend the day walking around in heels. Kinda ridiculous. Lol

Just an FYI: I'm never getting married.

Okay, cheers!!
K

47 & 46

I am soooo tired of being me.

Lets pull a freaky Friday and change with someone

48

I hate it when I let people hurt me.

I know better.

They are never what they seem.

49

People are complete and total assholes.

I'm not kidding. As a whole the general population sucks and are only out for themselves.

I'm so tired of it.

And they wonder why I just want to be alone or hang out with family?

50 & 49

Hi there non-readers. How's life?

Well my ear is STILL KILLING ME. Isn't that awesome?

So ridiculous. I swear when I look back at this year all going to see is how sick I was.

Can I please just feel better?

Blah

51

50 lbs to lose is insane. I'm not working out. I've just completely changed my damn eating habits. Seriously it's sooo different.

However, I've lost a total of 25lbs in almost a year. Maybe it's possible to do it in another year. I can NOT, repeat can NOT be Ashley's fat frien at her wedding.

I've 51 days to lose 5 more pounds to meets goal for the 365 days.

What do you think? Can I do it?

Sigh


Well, I think I'm at least moving in the right direction. Ash days I'm becoming a crazy health person, but I'm not really. I think I'm just finally taking responsibility for what im doing to myself.

Oh well, I'll keep you informed.


Cheers,
Kristi

52

Hanging out with friends is imperative!

53

So, I actually haven't kept track of when this ear ache started, but I still effing have it!! I mean seriously NOTHING IS HELPING.

I'm so annoyed, because I'm gonna have to call the doctor again and pay for everything AGAIN!!!

Seriously, can I please catch a break?

54

I've said it before and I'll say it again: I'm a terrible person.

I seriously have issues.

55

Isn't it funny how it's an election  year as well as the "year of change" for Me? Ummm nope it's just stupid. I"m not someone who is obsessed with politics. I am really feeling that it truly wont matter one way or the other who we get, they are  both pieces of shit who don't give a damn if I can't pay my rent to take care of myself and my son. Don't care that I get no help and yet have no money.

So I say screw it. It's not going to matter what I get. It's all garbage.

boooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo


Cheers,
Kristi

On a lighter note, Bakery on Main instant GF oatmeal is fantastic!!!

56

I'm here to tell you that there is absolutely such a thing as "too much of a good thing!""

Heed my warning ladies!!

XOXO

57

I hate groceries. Does everyone absolutely despise spending money on what essentially you will be pooping out?

This drives me crazy. Also, being gluten free everything is twice as much money. It's a very big frustration for me.

Someone tell me why, because I'm intolerant of certain food, I have to suffer the price?

Food allergies/ intolerances do not only effect rich families. They have no social conscience.

I know that this is the same for diabetics and the like. It's just been really striking me lately that it's completely unfair and a HUGE form of discrimination.

I'm sorry I'm just pissed right this very moment that if you WANT to get healthy in this world you have to have money in order to do so.

It's yet another way we are moving further and further from the democracy we were founded on.

I'm disgusted.

K

59 & 58

Ugh sooooooo lol I've clearly forgotten to write again. I'm kind of down to writing every other day.

I've been thinking about it and really it's not a bad idea to continue doing this until. Ashley's wedding next year. Might hold me accountable.

I've got less than one year to lose another 50lbs. Not sure that's even possible.

That is however my goal.

Maybe smoother skin, and just better health in general.

61 & 60

Ever wonder what you're doing? I do ALL the time. Then I go through periods where I think I don't care. I'm making my way and doing the best I can.

I'm making the best of my situation. I'm playing the hand I'm dealt. And yes, I realize that I'm mixing analogies there. lol

I have a little less than 2 months to lose the remaining 10 lbs to actually REACH the goal I set for myself. I really didnt think I could do it, but now I really feel like I should keep trying.

10 lbs in 60 days?!?! Come on KRISTI you can freakin' do it!!!!


Keep your fingers crossed for me.


K

63 & 62

Okay, Emperor of the Universe, you can take this ear infection any time.


Please and thanks


Cheers,
Kristi

64

Don't really have a lot to say, so I'm going to share a song I'm in love with. :)

For some reason Blogger wouldn't let me upload the video I WANTED to upload from youtube so I'm just gonna link to it.

Oh Adam Levine, why you so sexy?!

Here's the better video right HERE!!

Kristi

66 & 65

Was feeling too crappy last night. So, I forgot to post.

Ear is killing me. Not really looking forward to the next couple of months of work.

Blah and blah.

On a brighter note, I got some castile soap today, and I'm going to be trying out some home remedies for cleaning supplies. Perhaps then I will actually clean?


Who knows....?

Luv Yas,
Kristi

67

I just don't want her to end up like Sarah Braverman. Is that such a bad thing?

It's interesting. Its almost like the world would like you to think that you can't make it on an income of bar tips, but the reality my friends, is a completely different story.

If you're talented and willing to do it, you can be quite well-off.


Sad sad state of affairs.

68

I swear the more I try to get healthy the more I feel sick? It's almost like the beginning of the year again, where I was so sick for months that I didn't know what to do with myself.

My body is falling apart. There aren't a whole lot of good parts of me left. My teeth situation is quite frightening actually.

I think it's time to seriously consider getting them completely redone. I think maybe I should actually take a serious interest in my mouth for a little while. What do you think?


Yay? Nay? Hmmmm

Things to consider.


Cheers,
Kristi

68 & 67

Oh Rick Riordan, you are a joy!!


Thanks,
Kristi

69

Is anyone reading this? Most likely not, but on December 11, 2012 I will be going through this blog to see if ice actually made any progress this year, as a person.

I can't believe how close the day is coming.

70

All this information out there. Some of it makes a lot of sense. Others just don't.

I know good and damn well that medications save lives. If it weren't for antibiotics, I would be one huge bucket of strep throat. It's just that these things make sense to me.

If we continue to eat garbage, our bodies will continue to produce garbage. Even more, that garbage will fester in our bodies, produce landfills inside that we can never get rid of.

I am not a scientist. I am not a doctor. I am not even what you could consider well informed. I've preferred to hide my head in the sand of my life and go day to day as though this life is one to waste. I have such a huge fear of death that this just scares me. I can't even think of it or I start to get sick to my stomach. My life isn't what I thought it would be.

It's not going to change. I'm never going to be famous and rich. I'm not even going to be the girl who's married to the sexy guy and has a beautiful family.

It's so hard to be me in my head. We all go through things and everyone has something that someone else wants. It's just one of those things about life.

I know I covet. But why? Because I'm unhappy. I'm doing my damnedest to get to a point where this isn't my dominant emotion. That's what a lot of this year has been about. It's been about me deciding who I'm going to be. It maybe just about finding out who I will be and what I'll stand for.

I have gifts. I know I do. I just need to find them again.

To anyone out there just muddling through trying to figure out your life, keep trying. If there's hope for me then there is hope for you.

All my love,
Kristi