200&199

Sometimes I really wonder why my mind works the way it does.  I mean sometimes I wish it would just shut up!

202&201

I'm not sure if I'm changing or if people are changing. It's been a bit  surreal.

206-203

Arrrrgggghhhhh!!! Will someone trade places with me for a week please?

211-207

The Vampire Diaries season finale was amazing. I confess I've been really disappointed with the whole season 4 but the season finale? Best yet by FAR!!!! Oh my God people I was squealing and stomping like a 13 year old girl.

I don't care if you aren't a fan of the show, there are some things that can just make you happy. A well written, tremendously performed hour of escape is well worth a nod.

Of course, it makes you wish and want even more, but I suppose that just comes with the territory of being me.

Anyhow, on a little side note that thing I said I wanted desperately the other day? The one where I even asked you ( whomever you may be) to work your voo-doo magic on? Well, I fear it isn't going to come to fruition.

I just have a sense that I need to stop dreaming about it and try to figure out a way to live in the now as best I can. I co fess it's getting harder and harder as Wyatt hates living here now too.

It's all very depressing. Sorry!! I know I said I'd try hard not to be such a Debbie Downer.

Perhaps I'm putting the cart before the horse. I haven't been given the final 'No' yet. I'll for sure keep you posted though.

Cheers,

Kristi 

216-212

I have been so LAX with this blog lately. Not nearly as hard on myself or as determined to write every day like last year. Of course, last year was the descent to 30, so to speak, and I was really trying to accomplish something.

I really and truly thought this year was going to be a good one. I just had really high hopes for good prospects and just expected good outcomes to occur. It turns out that it's been an emotional roller coaster and a laundry list of more things to work on.

This is probably a reality for so many people. Consider this: everyone has something that they need to work on and probably feel like they've been gypped or have it harder than everyone else. So, with that said, I am fully aware that my son and I should consider ourselves lucky that we have so much. Lucky that both of us have enough food to eat. Enough food that both of us are on the overweight side of things. I have been trying to instill a little bit of gratitude in Wyatt lately and some other "manner" type things and it does appear to be sinking in a little bit.

Anyhow, as much as I'm aware that I need to be grateful, I also have to say that living in a apartment is no longer something I wish to tolerate. I'm tired of living the lives of 3 other renters. I'm tired of being surrounded by idiots or assholes. I'm so sick of not being able to listen to music as loud as I'd like. I hate smelling other people's dinners, which generally smell absolutely atrocious.

It's official. After almost 6 years of apartment living, especially with a small child, I'm OVER IT!!!! I used to think I had the best landlords in the world because they were so nice and really they let me pay them the Friday I get paid, instead of always on the first of the month. This has helped me tremendously in the past. However, I must say that if I'm really going to be responsible for doing everything myself, why don't I just find a house?

The answer, my friends, is that houses for rent are ASTROMICAL!!! I mean outrageously priced ridiculousness. I just can't do it anymore. I've got to find a way to get out of this situation and yet, I fear at this particular juncture, it's not an option.


If anyone stumbles upon this blog post or just accidentally is reading this, I ask you to do whatever you do...i.e. cross your fingers, say a prayer, skyclad chanting, whichever it is you do, lend me your thoughts for a minute in the hopes that you will assist me in something that I am desperately hoping will happen, but will not say/write/text/email etc etc out loud until I know for sure that it won't happen. In other words, please say a prayer that a house falls in my lap. Or send me a spell to bolster my thoughts so that if I "see it and think it" it will come true. ;)

Sure, it could just bee hoo-doo, voo-doo craziness, but I DO believe in jinxes and let me tell you, I have the worst luck EVER!!! I am still bound and determined to get the things I want and feel Wyatt and I need. I am hoping by this time next year, we will live somewhere that is better for us all-around.



Here's hoping!!

K

217

Sometimes I spend too much time thinking about how I'm going to end up in the fields of asphodel. :( makes for bad dreams.

219-218

Every once in awhile you have to take stock and remember that at least you aren't the craziest person you know. :)

K

228-220

So, I've been trying really hard NOT to give up on my body. I even did what you're supposed to do when you're in pain or having problems. I went to the doctor. He basically didn't help me at all. It's ridiculously depressing.

I just want my feet to work properly.

:(