158

I'm really starting to wonder about myself. I mean here I am, 29 years old and I've been 29 years old for over six months and all I've been focused on is turning 30. and of course that's very frustrating for me.

So, here I am waiting for my life to change and the reality is that I don't think I'm ever going to be very different. I want so much to not be me anymore.

I'm trying to decide if I should go ahead and join weight watchers again, or if I should just give up the ghost.

I really am sick and tired of having to feel like this every fucking day! I want a new life. However, at the same time you wish for something like that and they always say be careful what you wish for, I know that I am sick and tired of complaining on this stupid blog every single day if anyone would actually come and read this sad, pathetic, ridiculous excuse for a blog they probably just vomit.

I've got 158 days to not be fat anymore. I have the hundred and 58 days to not look like me anymore. I have 158 days to be different.

Do you really think I can accomplish this goal? Do I really feel that anything is ever going to be different? I am starting to think that I was meant to be something I'm not. it's something I pretend to be and something that comes easily to me. However, it's not something respectable.

So, after much thought I'm just going to keep on moving on. Until, the next problem...

Much Love,
Kristi